Local doofer reconnects with nature after indulging in a synthetic buffet

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B-Side is our latest news section breaking the stories you won’t read about anywhere else. Hard hitting news f the back a truck that we published without fact checking.

Sydney University biochemistry student Travis Dean has expressed his reconnection with nature following a recent bush do that B-Side Media was lucky enough to attend.

Travis – who grew up in the seaside suburb Manly – spoke with B-Side Editor Micky ‘Muscles’ McClure at the fourth annual Rainbow Dreadlock festival today, taking place in the dusty terrain bum-fuck Idaho in western Shitsville. He said that he “discovers a new love and respect for the world around me every time I venture into a do”.

“Honestly, nothing makes you feel closer to nature than a satty full tabs and maybe a few nangs in the morning. It’s no intercontinental breakfast, but why are you talking to me, frog?”. From here, Travis scuffled f into the crowd in a panic, to the tune a pulsing, psy-trance heater.

We were then swiftly shuffled f the grounds by an older, more experienced doer – who we presume was far more in-tune with nature due to the dirtiness his feet, length his dreads and the bagginess his pants – who went by the name Ocean Soul.